Sexy King Henry VIII

Wow. We are getting personal now, aren’t we?

Okay, there comes a time in a young person’s life when they begin getting these feelings for members of the opposite sex…

It’s a lot like my dad told me. “It’s like a giant who’s sleeping. You could wake him up, but he’ll probably do a lot of damage if he’s in the wrong place…”

What I really want to say is this:

I watched the first three episodes of “The Tudors” last night. I found myself really liking it – the Renaissance costumes, the music, the acting (all stupendous). Still, every time hot young Henry VIII took off his shirt, I covered my head with a blanket. I’m not sure that is normal.

Scary Sex. Afraid of the dark. Horror Movies.
“If I close my eyes, maybe the sexy people won’t see me…”

It’s not that sex isn’t cool, or that I don’t want to be involved with it as a principal. I just don’t really want to look at other people doing it. Inevitably I end up thinking, “Wow, her skin is a lot nicer than mine,” or “Why doesn’t my body stretch like that?” Every time, it ends up becoming a mental dossier on why I keep the lights out.

Recently, I have been thinking a lot about sex. Not in the way that most 15-35 year-old men think of sex. It’s more like an alien from another planet would think about sex, with a kind of reserved interest and moderate curiosity. Why would we engage in something that is so messy and clumsy? What is the real pay-off? Is it really worth the trouble of dating, courting, marrying, lying (or whatever we do to get it) to get about 3 minutes of a pleasant, satisfying feeling that goes away as soon as we roll into the wet spot on the bed?

And then, there are all kinds of different ways that people want it. That’s something they don’t tell you before you’re married.

“By the way, sex is like food. Everyone likes it a little differently. I hope you are into Vegan Indo-European cuisine, cause that’s the only thing I eat.” It’s a lucky match to find someone who will do the weird things you want to do (or not do), because invariably there will come a day when one of you decides that you should stop trying to eat together.

I guess it’s not really about sex, is it? It’s really about recognizing that life is a messy, clumsy, and uncomfortable place in general. Sex is not the only disturbing and exciting activity that we undergo on this planet. Our lives are filled with things that are equally wonderful and horrible at the same time. Sex is the epitome of the human experience: A process of weeks, months, or years to get to a single moment of pleasure that fades quickly on the skin in a matter of moments.

But, if you are very lucky, the process isn’t as much about the end result as it is about the experience. Sex is also a journey of the soul. Perhaps that is why we keep doing it, regardless of age, race, or ugliness. It is another addition to our bag of experiences: a moment of goodness in an otherwise awkward world.

You Have Time for Just One More:

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